Parental alienation occurs when one parent intentionally tries to damage a child’s relationship with the other parent. It’s not always loud or obvious. Sometimes, it’s subtle and persistent. Signs of parental alienation can include:
- A child refusing contact with one parent without a clear reason.
- One parent speaking negatively about the other parent in front of the child.
- A child repeating the other parent’s anger or fear.
- Communication or visitation being blocked or delayed.
- A child seems uncomfortable showing affection toward the parent who is being alienated.
These signs don’t confirm alienation on their own. But when they appear together, they raise serious concerns.
New York courts take parental alienation seriously because it can harm a child’s emotional development. In a situation of parental alienation, a child can experience feelings of guilt, confusion, and stress, which can lead to longer term impacts such as difficulty forming healthy relationships, low self-esteem, and emotional instability.
Judges consider how each parent supports the child’s relationship with the other and may look at other factors such as the child’s behavior – particularly changes in behavior – and any signs of manipulation or coercion. These factors can affect custody decisions. From the court’s perspective, if a parent is engaging in parental alienation, the court will deem the actions by that parent as acts “inconsistent with the best interests of the children” and that these acts “raise a strong probability that the offending party is unfit to act as a custodial parent.”
It is important to note, however, that courts do not act on one-off comments. Courts look for a pattern of behavior that shows an intent to damage a child’s relationship with the other parent. Courts also look for is whether there is culpable behavior on both sides of the equation. If each side is engaging in alienating behavior, but one side is seemingly worse than another, the court will not determine that there is parental alienation occurring.
Parental alienation can be painful for both the child and the parent who is being alienated. Emotional impacts of parental alienation on the parent who is targeted can include anxiety, depression, and a sense of loss or grief. If there is evidence of parental alienation in a family, it is important to act early. Parental alienation often builds quietly, and over time, it can reshape a child’s relationship with and perspective of their parents. Being aware of the signs of parental alienation can help families address the issue early, protect the well-being of the child, and encourage healthy co-parenting.
At Donnellan Law, PLLC, we know that divorce is a unique and individual experience. Although divorce is common, every situation is different. Attorneys build a personal “legal roadmap” with clients which are specifically designed to address the unique and individual circumstances in areas such as child support, custody, and spousal support.
To schedule an initial consultation, visit www.dlawfirmny.com/contact.